As a parent and an educator, it’s a helpless feeling to want to help your student but not have the keys you need to unlock their motivation. This can happen with all students—gifted and talented students, first-generation students, athletic students—it’s across the board.

I see this often when working with first-generation and low-income students. Working with these students comes naturally to me. I am one of them. My own past fuels my purpose and passion daily. However, it’s not only first-generation students in this category, it’s all students.

I’ve seen it happen again and again. Sometimes it’s in the arena of Arts and Athletics. A talented student who has put thousands of hours into perfecting a skill suddenly decides to walk away. They are simply too tired to continue doing “that thing.” While I can certainly respect this decision, the next question asked should be, “What will you be pursuing in the future?”

I’ve asked myself on a thousand occasions, what does this student need? What am I not seeing? What is the missing piece with this student? Every one matters, no one left behind. From my perspective, finding the key to motivating every single student is the only option available.

I’ve got all the resources a student needs; in some cases, I’ve handed over those resources on what I call a silver platter. The only thing holding this student back is them taking and utilizing the resources I’ve given them. Why does that seem so hard? Why can’t this student see that their future, their whole life could be different if they would just grasp the truths right in front of them?

I think the answers to these questions are hidden in what we don’t know, rather than what we do know.

• Do they understand the value?
• Do they have basic needs met?
• Are they able to see the long-term benefits?
• Have I helped paint a vision of what will be different if they choose path A or path B?
• Do they understand what they are inadvertently saying no to?
• Do they understand the consequences of their choices?
• Do they feel respected and safe in the way I’ve presented the options?

After I’ve answered each of these questions and ensured I’ve provided a supportive environment, I make a concerted effort to connect with the student on a personal level. I strive to:

1. Build Trust and Rapport: Establishing a genuine relationship with the student is crucial. They need to feel that I am invested in their success and well-being.
2. Set Realistic and Achievable Goals: Breaking down larger objectives into smaller, manageable steps helps students feel a sense of accomplishment and progress.
3. Encourage Self-Reflection: I ask students to reflect on their interests, passions, and what drives them. Understanding their intrinsic motivations can reignite their enthusiasm.
4. Provide Positive Reinforcement: Celebrating small victories and providing positive feedback can boost a student’s confidence and willingness to continue striving.
5. Foster a Growth Mindset: Encouraging students to view challenges as opportunities for growth rather than obstacles can change their perspective on effort and perseverance.
6. Create a Supportive Network: Involving parents, peers, and other mentors can create a robust support system that reinforces the student’s motivation and aspirations.

By addressing these factors and continuously seeking to understand the unique needs and circumstances of each student, we can unlock their potential and help them navigate their educational journey with renewed motivation and purpose. Every student deserves the opportunity to succeed, and it’s our role as parents and educators to provide the keys to unlock that success.